I am a Buddhist. I was born in a Buddhist country (Sri Lanka), to a Buddhist family so I suppose to some extent I will always be biased. But some of what you described seems alien to me. I haven’t studied any texts about the Buddha to the extent most of my family members have but I still feel you’ve made some generalisations.

Siddhartha Gautama never asked for money from his father from the texts I have read. Yes he did leave his wife and son but he always planned to return. They may still have suffered but as you said yourself there is so much suffering in the world, his family was well taken care of (he was a prince after all). Many people today have never met their biological father or mother. Some of them belong to families who faired much worse, maybe some of them even had to work multiple jobs.

Secondly, nowhere in the texts I have read has someone said “smile” to someone who was depressed. Nor have they recommended it. I think this point was probably about perspective. Psychological studies have shown that people who feel more in control of their own life have more confidence in their abilities to cope with stressors and mental or physical health problems. Now psychology isn’t exactly a science but I’m sure you could find more than a few people who feel this way. Plus optimists apparently live longer. This doesn’t mean you should force a smile but you certainly shouldn’t victimise yourself either as then you may let your depression control parts of your life (you otherwise could control). There are however rare cases when I can see this may not be true. Specifically there was a girl, a couple of years back, with multiple diagnosed mental illnesses due to neurological problems who was seeking euthanasia. She may have suffered so much she could not function. Leading to her rejecting food and water to commit suicide.

You were correct in saying that it is preached that there is a “right way” to be doing things and wrong way as well but I don’t think they’re as inflexible as you think. For example I’ve never been told to listen to a specific kind of music. My parents listen to songs with swearing. I’ve watched multiple MA 15+ movies and would watch Game of Thrones if I could be bothered. I think some of these things were based around the idea that if you listen or watch certain “bad” media for too long, you would also have those ideas. Like men objectifying women in songs. I don’t necessarily think you’re a bad person for listening to those songs, but some people may disagree. I doubt the Buddha would judge you for it though, especially since unfair or biased judgement is considered a sin. Certainly you are told not to get too attached to material things as if you lose them, you will likely suffer. I love music, but I could live without my rock music about sex and hard drugs if I absolutely had to.

By reaching Nirvana you are not ignoring the suffering of others, you are controlling your own suffering. It is then your task to help others reach Nirvana. Just because you are not experiencing suffering you don’t suddenly become a narcissist who refuses to help others. It’s true that it’s difficult to tell if someone reaches Nirvana. But it’s not something only the powerful can achieve, and certainly those wielding it as a power have not achieved it. For if you reached Nirvana you would be detached from your ego too (because “you” don’t exist, a whole new topic of discussion).

You’ve also ignored a great positive aspect of Buddhism, the concept of suffering being something everyone experiences. Suffering being something that is not placed as an obstacle by a higher power to test your strength. Having completed religious education in primary and high school, It has never been explained to me why some suffer more than others. They may have their own reasoning which I did not learn of course, but I still find the concept of suffering being an innate part of the human experience much more comforting. Some people experience suffering less than others but privilege is not a sin. Everyone will suffer, allowing people to empathise with people they never have before.

I should also specifically mention that there are different versions of Buddhism with many different features just as there are Protestants, Catholics and Christian people with different customs and views (even if only slightly). I am only sharing my perspective.

I don’t expect to convert you, and I would not want you too either. I hope you’ll still reconsider some of the arguments you have made. As you can see from the comments, you’ve made far too many generalisations.